I had a blip.
A 3 day blip.
Not particularly proud of the blip, kind of blip.
But still, I'm here to tell the tale and I'm now okay 😊
I just wanted to make a note of it to remind myself and others that recovery really isn't a straight line, and things can get really tricky.
I'm still in a state of mind whereby I feel like I've failed a little bit, but that's because I'm a self confessed perfectionist and control freak when it comes to my recovery.
When I was in the depths of anorexia, I always wanted to be the 'perfect anorexic' from the moment I got the label. Now I have been in recovery for a year and a half, I've wanted have the 'perfect recovery'.
Unfortunately this isn't realistic.
My therapist said to me today that most clinicians would be worried if their clients started recovery and never had a blip or a lapse. So I guess my recovery is normal in their eyes?
I don't really know the point of this blog entry, but I guess it's mostly just for me so I can write down that actually, it is okay to have blips/lapses, and that it is completely normal.
Unfortunately nobody can be perfect at being perfect.
Stay safe, have a lush day,
Dais xo
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