Quick reflection on my 2 years!

Hello lovelies!

So today marks 2 years in recovery for me. 2 years since I decided that I no longer wanted to be controlled by my eating disorder and that I wanted to commit to the best of my ability to living a life that is full of self care, love and looking after my inner child.

Granted, this isn't always the case - as I like to remind people, recovery isn't linear so there is no possible way that over the past 2 years I would have been in 'recovery mindset' 24/7. That's unrealistic. Someone once said to me that it takes double the amount of time you suffered with an eating disorder to overcome it, so given that, I'm in such early recovery still, therefore i need to give myself some slack.

It's not all doom and gloom though! Yes I've had weeks, and sometimes a couple of months at a time when I've really struggled, but on the whole recovery has always been on my mind. No matter how bad things have got, I've continued to go to therapy when I need it and I continued to talk to my friends. Both of which, in my first year of recovery, I would have found quite hard. This year has by far been more tricky in regards to potentially triggering events, but easier in recovery. I've been able to bounce back from blips so much quicker, and that's such progress.

As I start to let go of my eating disorder a bit more, whether that's by finishing ED therapy, unfollowing recovery accounts on social media or putting down boundaries with myself, life feels a little smoother. A little more free. A little less stressful. I have more time to think about my inner child, and more time to get back to participating in activities that I love. For the first time this past year, i've thrown myself back into performing arts and have made it my mission to be in one last show before I finish university. These goals although not directly focused on improving my food related issues, are improving and keeping my recovery on track.

I've also found that this past year has been the year of finding my best friends. They've all supported me constantly in many different ways, and they're all honestly the most incredible people I have ever met. I am so so grateful. They've kept me on track when maybe I could have been tempted to give up, they've held me close when I've been struggling and celebrated my victories with me. I am literally so lucky. I'm so grateful for this past year, and I am so proud of myself for hitting my two years feeling reasonably positive about year 3 in recovery.

Over and out, Dais x

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